Sunday, February 6, 2011

One Piece at a Time

I commented on Facebook the other day that I was disillusioned to think I could do it all. I work. I student teach. I tutor. I maintain a home. I pay bills, grocery shop, research for a thesis, attend master's program every Saturday, swim lessons on Wednesday, teach a class at church, volunteer, oh, and did I mention that I have two children to parent: homework, piano, little league, scouts, choir, band, mathletes, and just the every day occurrences that come with being a wife and mother. I've been having those, "what was I thinking?" moments.
So, here is the I crazy? I think so. Just a little. But I have a plan. I never look at the whole picture. I look just at the piece required to get me by right then in that moment. The big picture is so overwhelming it makes me want to vomit. Those of you who know me know that I'm a puker. My schedule is hectic, I've given up the things I love, scrapbooking, walking, reading novels for things I hate and am not very good at, swimming, running and eating Cheetos. I have perfected eating Cheetos since starting my master's program, but that comes with regret. I'm not sure about the rest of it yet. If it comes with regret I am in big trouble and my plan will have failed. I'll let you know in June.