Friday, August 29, 2008

total incommunicado

On Monday my sweet husband brought me home a treadmill! I am hoping this will be my method of keeping up the running through the winter. Yes, winter comes early in the pacific northwest. In doing so he took out our telephone line. He snapped it like Indiana Jones and his whip right across our front lawn with a giant Penske moving truck. The phone company said that they could get it repaired by Thursday at 5:30 p.m. It is Friday morning and no sign of the phone company. As many of you might know we are the last of a dieing breed. Practically extinct. Job and I every day hear the lovely tone of dial-up Internet. Many of you older readers may remember that electronic screeching sound that came with dial-up, but never would I have thought I would have missed that hideous noise. Then last night, after an amazing experience in Bellevue with a group of incredible women, I left my cell phone in Job's car. So, if anyone wants to contact me, TOO BAD! And, hopefully, when I get the call back about the job interview I have this afternoon, she'll leave a message!

Friday, August 15, 2008

Sometimes, I Just Need Time To Process

Its been a wile since my last post but so many odd things have happened I'm not quite sure where to start. And by "odd" I don't necessarily mean bad (though maybe I do)...I just mean overwhelming in strange sort of way. These events have been too numerous over the past two weeks to write a narrative on each one so I'm going to list them and you can look forward to hearing about some of them in detail at a later date.
  • I took my niece to a midnight book opening where I was surrounded by more teenage girls than I knew what to do with. I referred to it in a text message to Job as "teenpalooza"
  • Drove 12 hours to visit my sister in Idaho with my entire fam
  • Read a smutty teenage vampire book (750 pages worth) that I didn't particularly enjoy, but after staying up till midnight to get it with a "million" teenage girls at Borders I was going to finish it out of principle
  • Did a speed tour of Old Faithful
  • Took my kids on long walks in 90 degree weather in a somewhat unfamiliar town out of fear that they were annoying other people at my sister's house
  • Found out that Pocatello Idaho builds houses on a complete foundation of rocks and boulders, making for long hours laying sprinkler pipe
  • Came to the realization that my swimsuit (from last year) makes me look ridiculous and like I'm seventy years old (I left it in the trash can at Lava Springs)
  • Got lost on the way home from Idaho
  • Almost hit a deer on the way home from Idaho
  • Were almost in a head on collision on the way home from Idaho
  • Got pulled over for speeding after getting lost on the way home from Idaho
  • Got home from Idaho at 1:30 a.m. a mere 12 hours before the family reunion invasion
  • Had over 20 people camping in my backyard for a family reunion- IT RAINED
  • Had 20+ people move into my tiny house due to rain at the family reunion
  • found out my sister in law eloped (but not a true elopement) to the bishops back yard to a guy we'd never met at the family reunion
  • "HEY KIDS! MEET UNCLE MATT!"
  • Had crying relatives at the family reunion
  • I offended people at the family reunion
  • We picked trash, dirty diapers, and left over stuff out of our yard for three hours after the family reunion (now Job is offending family) two trailer loads of stuff pulled out of the back yard
  • Took my niece to get our smutty teenage vampire books signed and realized my sisters dog chewed my copy, stood in line a really long time, but the music was cool and the author was chubby! She even had cellulite! Go chubby girls!
  • Took the boys on a hike up a mountain- realized when we got down I had picked one of the hottest days of the summer!

Its been a great couple of weeks. Oh, and did I mention, I gained 4 pounds through all of this! There's the cherry on top. If there is any one bulleted item you would like to hear about let me know. I'll do my best to get it posted!

Monday, August 4, 2008

Still Obese- Geese Louise

I have lost a lot of weight. Close to 150 pounds. I was told that the average woman in America is a size 14. I'm feeling pretty average by this standard. The other day I signed up for SparkPeople (an online health tracking website) and in entering my data I was informed I am still obese. If I loose 3-4 pounds I'll be in the overweight category. Is anyone in this blasted country want to join me in the "happy to be overweight category?" The only upside to this revelation is that after my discovery I ran a 5K in 32 minutes 5 seconds. Oh, Happy Day!