Boils- Really?

Every once in a while one of the boys gets a wart. A bumpy little funky fungus that protrudes from somewhere on their body. Compound W bandages and duct tape have worked so far. I thought My Little One was getting a few but no- I am not joking- he has boils on his legs. Immediately I thought of Job 2:7 (with some differences of course). He is Job's "mini-me" but this is ridiculous!

Hole-y Water Batman!

It hasn't been the best of times here at the homestead. It has been a rough go and oh- I am thankful for distractions. Tonight we had another. Job and I and the fam are finally going on a vacation. We saved for a while and this spring had the funds to book the airline tickets and rent the car. On Wednesday we land in balmy Oklahoma City, Oklahoma! So tonight, in anticipation of the vacation, I began working on the pre-trip to-do list. I decided to tackle "wash the dog" (she's staying at her boyfriend's house and wants to be sparkly) while Rob charged and loaded the i-pods. I got the bum deal in that by the way. Anyway, I went up to the bathroom off Mason's room and plopped Georgie into the tub. While I bathed Georgie all the water was draining down three flights of wall leaving lovely holes in it wake. We tore out the drywall and luckily this cracked pipe decided to give while we were home and not while we were enjoying 88 degrees with a good chance of thunder showers. And Job thinks I am a pessimist!

I am Grateful for Goat Cheese

For a long time all the things that made Job, Job lay dormant. The hard times that we thought were behind us (or chose to ignore) and whose sharp edges that hurt had been eroded a little with time all in some way or another have resurfaced thanks to people with no morals or heart. And it hurts all over again. The things that were unbearable but eventually with prayer, laughter and a good dose of sarcasm became manageable have reared there ugly heads. Part of me yells, "Go ahead, BRING IT ON!" That is the part that remembers the sweet message calmly whispered to me in tough times, "you are strong." The other part pleads "Why me? Why us? Haven't we had ENOUGH?" I have always trusted in an inherent goodness in mankind though I'm not sure I had "faith in humanity" as the saying goes. If I did...I am quickly loosing it. Perhaps I need a simple change in focus (or a trip far away). I should remember the things I have, like Oprah's old gratitude journal. So here it is:
Day 1 - I am thankful for goat cheese, my boys, and a flower bed that needs to be finished- because that is the only thing that is getting me out of bed today.

Tuesday’s Detour

I don’t usually enjoy the fall.  It brings winter. But yesterday I had a peaceful moment that brought a little bit of “calm” to my anxiety laden life.

Yesterday I was forced to take a detour on highway 203 between Duvall and Monroe.  I was heading home. It was beautiful.  I am not sure I can write the reasons: maybe the river, the trees still holding on to their leaves, the farms that dot the valley, the sunshine that allowed me to drive with the window down, the quiet that I usually dread was even a comfort to me.  It was one of those brief moments that become a memory though you aren’t even sure why.  It was a beautiful addition.  I want to drive the detour again just to repeat the feeling of calm and contentment I felt but I am afraid it wouldn’t be the same.

However, when I got home I began thinking about my detour and a little bit of guilt set in.  You see, the detour was in place due to a fatality accident.  I even saw the ambulance come into Monroe with lights on but no speed behind it.  As if its passenger didn’t seem to be bothered by how quickly it made it to Valley General.  The drivers took the curves with caution but no urgency  accompanied this leg of the journey.

I wish I could have given some of the peace I felt to the family finding out about their loss.  I know what its like, and I would have traded them: their pain for my moment of serenity.  I wouldn’t have had it in the first place right? Its a shame their beautiful day would be scarred and mine still remain lovely.  I pray they find solace, if not in that day in another soon.

Morning Breath- PeeYew

This weekend Gram Cracker a.k.a. Grandma Jam came for a visit and everyone stayed up way too late.  I crawled in bed Sunday morning with my smallest snuggle buggle and cozied right up to wake him up.  He turned around to kiss my cheek and I was immediately blown away by the worst smell I have smelled in a really long time.  His Breath! I told him he had bad breath and to not breathe on me and he replied, “I sleep with my mouth open you know.  Something must have crawled in there.”  Yeah, crawled in there and died!

First Day Jitters- In Grad School? Aren’t I too old for that?

I use to walk into a classroom and immediately scan the room to see if I was the fattest person in the room.  Tomorrow I start my masters in teaching program at City University.  While I will never be the smallest person in the room, after loosing over 150#, I usually am not the largest.  Now I am worried about being the oldest.  I graduated 13 years ago.  I had a great career and did a lot of helpful things with my population of chronically mentally ill adults.  I can honestly say I was a good counselor.  Most of my clients liked me (a few in an inappropriate way), and I genuinely and appropriately liked some of them.  Some I did not.  And then I was afforded the privilege of staying home with my two boys.  I had envied the mom’s who were able to stay home and I loved it, and the boys, as I had my turn as a stay at home mom.

Last year when my youngest started first grade I worked at the school.  I loved every minute of it.  One of my supervisors told me I was a “natural born teacher.”  Another told me I did my job perfectly.  However, I did not receive a renewed contract this year.  The outrage and and calls and cards from the other teacher was comforting and, after getting over that blow I got my ducks in a row and decided to go back to school.

Lately I have been questioning that decision.  I have a perfectly good education.  Is it wasteful to not use the one I already have?  Am I being greedy?  It isn’t like I jumped into this decision.  All the usual thinking, praying and planning took place.  I even ordered all my textbooks, made a really cute if not giant tote bag to carry all my stuff, and have committed every Saturday for what seems an eternity to complete this desire and goal. 

A good friend of ours and local city council woman gave Job a book the other day.  She is genuinely nice and has done right by the citizens who entrusted her with their vote.  But anyway, in the book, Job read me a quote by one of our favorite American Patriots Benjamin Franklin (and it surprisingly has not even one animal reference).  He read it to me as I was anxiously contemplating my upcoming first day of school:

“I think, moreover, that the talents for the education of youth are the gift of God; and that he [or she] on whom they are bestowed, whenever a way is opened to use them, is as strongly called as if he [or she] heard a voice from heaven…”

I feel better.  We’ll see how tomorrow goes.  Thanks Job for your support, and Benjamin for the reassurance.

e-bay seller e_middleman SUCKS!

I got duped.  On Saturday I start my masters program at City University.  In preparation for two years of coursework, student teaching and a dissertation, I bought a new Laptop.  It is larger than our old one and I needed to get a new sleeve to keep its shiny red exterior in good condition!  I found a great deal on e-bay.  Almost too good to be true and it said “free shipping in the U.S.” on top of everything.  Even before I won the bid I had seen what I had done.  I didn’t look in all the shipping areas and while it said free at the bottom of the description when you clicked further into the site it charges $14.99.  The cover, I am guessing weighs less than 8 oz.  I knew immediately I’d been scammed.  I emailed e-middleman, who I am now guessing stole an entire box of these off the back of a truck somewhere, to clarify his “error.”  His e-mail back was rude!  He told me I got a $50 dollar item for $16 and should basically suck it up.  He  is right.  I just hate the fact that I did business with someone so unethical.  I would have rather gone to the dell site and paid $35 +s/h for the cute polka dot one than have spent one dime on any item he had to sell!  As soon as I get confirmation of shipping I am giving him bad feedback and reporting him to e-bay.  e_middleman sucks!